3 years – this is the age in which the activity of the carapace begins to grow rapidly. Often, kids begin to “strange” behave, and many mothers with dads complain about the sudden manifestation of aggressiveness of children who are trying to bite, push or strike someone. Considering that 3 years is also the age when for the first time children are brought to a kindergarten, the “headache” of parents is significantly increased.
Why do small bastards become biting, and how to get rid of this “biting”?
We figure it out together!
content of the article:
- Reasons kusachesti and pugnacity three-year
- What to do when a child bites and fights – instruction
- Don’ts categorically?
Why a child of 3 years of all beats and bites at home or in the kindergarten – all causes of aggression of the three-year-old
Negative emotions are familiar to every person. And it is generally accepted that they are a manifestation of “evil” and a negative beginning in man.
However, it is worth remembering that emotions are a response to actions / words of surrounding people.
Unfortunately, emotions are able to control us, and they take possession of the little man completely. Hence the “feet” of strange child behavior grow.
Where does biting come from babies – the main reasons:
- Inadequate response of parents to biting and pugnaciousness. Perhaps, this reason can be called the most popular (and, not only with respect to aggressiveness). When a youngster bites for the first time or makes an attempt to fight, parents perceive this fact as a “stage of growing up”, and are limited to laughter, jokes or “he is still small, not scary.” But the child, without encountering a negative evaluation of his actions, begins to consider this behavior as the norm. After all, mom and dad smile – it means you can! Over time, this becomes a habit, and the child begins to bite and fight already consciously.
- The effect of the “mainstream”. When certain children in a kindergarten allow themselves biting and pugnacity and do not meet the teacher’s rebuff, “infection” also passes to other children. After a while, finding out the relationship between children in this way becomes a “norm”, because they simply were not taught to another.
- The answer to the offense. Pushed, took away the toy, offended by rudeness and so on. Unable to cope with feelings, the little one lets out the teeth and fists.
- The kid does not understand what is causing the other person pain (not explained).
- The situation in the house is unfavorable (conflicts, quarrels, unsuccessful families, etc.) for the peace of mind of the baby.
- Deficiency of activity (there are not enough opportunities for splashing out your emotions).
- Attention deficit. He may be missed at home or in kindergarten. “Abandoned” child draws attention by any means – and, as a rule, the child chooses the most negative.
course, to sound the alarm and should not panic if the toddler several times quietly “bit” dad or the child in a kindergarten group – but, if it becomes a habit , and the baby begins to cause real pain to children or parents, then it is time cardinally change something and contact a psychologist .
What to do if a child bites, hits other children or fights with parents – instruction, how to soothe fighter
passivity of parents in combating child kusachestyu may eventually come back to haunt a full-fledged disease, treat that will have not with patience and parental wit, but with the help of a psychiatrist. Therefore, it is important to respond in a timely manner and to stop the biting on the root.
If you are first encountered (felt by) with kusachestyu Chad react correctly: calmly and strictly (but without yelling, spanking and abuse) explain to your child that you can not do. Why the child can not be screamed, and how to replace parental cries in education?
Be sure to explain – why not .The child should understand and feel that you do not like this behavior at all, and it’s better not to repeat it in the future.
What to do next?
Remember the basic rules of fighting against biting and do not deviate from them a single step:
- We strictly and fairly react to all the “forts” of the karapuza. Any negative actions and attempts to eat, push, kick, etc., should be stopped instantly.
- We study the causes of the behavior of the baby. This item, perhaps, can even be put first. Analyze the situation! If you understand the reason for the biting of the child, then it will be easier for you to correct the situation.
- If the child demonstratively ignores the parent “this is not good,” look for a compromise. Do not let go of your hands.
- If you have banned a child, bring the educational process to its logical conclusion without fail. The word “no” must be iron. Prohibit and say “ah-yay-yay”, and then give up, because once or “nothing terrible” – it’s your loss.
- Talk with the child. Often explain about “good and bad,” eradicate bad habits in the bud, then you do not have to uproot them later.
- Be strict, but loving. The child should not be scared of you, the child must understand you.
- If the biting is the reaction of the child to the offense inflicted by peers , then teach the kid not to give himself offense and to meet the offenders in other ways. Use role-playing games, play the skits with which the kid learns to react correctly.
- Look closely at the group visited by the carapace, as well as to his peers. Perhaps, someone from the environment teaches him how to bite. Watch and for the kid himself – exactly how he communicates with other children in the kindergarten, do not offend him, does he not bully everyone himself.
- Be sure to ask the kid to regret the one he bit , and ask for forgiveness.
- If the biting is most active in the kindergarten, and the educator is unable to see your child because of the large number of children, consider the option of transferring the crumbs to another garden . Perhaps private, where they practice an individual approach.
- Give the child more space: personal space should be a lot. Your child should have the opportunity to express himself, to lose negative emotions, to cool feelings.
- Alternate active pursuits with the child with calm. And before bedtime, do not overload the baby’s nervous system: 2 hours before bedtime – only quiet games, one hour before bedtime – bathing with lavender, then warm milk, a fairy tale and sleep.
- Always encourage the good behavior of the baby . Basic principles of raising children without punishment
It is important to understand that biting is only the first time a prank. And then it can turn not only tears of the bitten comrade of your child, but also a serious trauma with suturing.
Well, and there is not far to the lawsuit filed by the parents of the victim.
When to seek help?
Most parents try to cope with children’s biting themselves – and that’s right! But there are situations in which a child psychologist can not do without.
You can assume that such a moment has come, if …
- You can not cope with the baby, and biting is already a habit.
- If the family has a complex atmosphere (divorce, conflicts, etc.), if there is a factor of severe life circumstances.
- If the biting baby is more than 3 years old. Errors that are unacceptable, or what not to do when a child bites or fights
Before weaning the bad boy from a bad habit, look carefully to yourself – whether you are doing everything right, no Do your child’s fault because of your discomfort.
Remember that the child in the first few years of life actively absorbs everything that is seen around.Therefore, it is important to be more critical of your actions and words.
What can not be done categorically when “treating” biting?
- Punish bites, raise the voice, beat the child , lock the kusak in the room and so on. Any punishment will be perceived with hostility, and the child will spite to all only increase the intensity of its biting.
- Laugh at such tricks of the baby, be touched by hooliganism and pranks and indulge his bad habit (as well as any other kinds of aggression and cruelty). Remember: we stop bad habits at once!
- Give in to blackmail (sometimes children use biting and rioting to force mom to buy something, stay longer on a visit, etc.). No screams and spanking – just take a crumb underarm and silently leave the store (guests).
- Answer the same. Even if you are hurt by a bite, it is strictly forbidden to respond bite or spank the child. Aggression only multiplies aggression. And for a child who does not understand that biting is bad, such an act will also be offensive.
- Ignore the harmful aggressive habits of the baby. This will lead to their strengthening.
- Take offense at the baby. Not all adults can control themselves, let alone talk about three-year-olds.
- Read serious lectures on morality. At this age the child they do not need. Explain the difference between “good and bad” you need, but an accessible language and, preferably, with examples.
The behavior you have chosen should be unchanged . Regardless of anything.
Have patience, and if your behavior is right, this crisis will quickly pass you by!
Were there similar situations in your family life? And how did you get out of them? Share your stories in the comments below!